about life.love.learning.

suicide

2005-03-26T04:44:00.000-08:00

It is silliness to live when to live is torment. -Shakespeare, "Othello"

The first time it happened I was ten.
It was an accident.

The second time I meant
To last it out and not come back at all.
I rocked shut

As a seashell.
They had to call and call
And pick the worms off me like sticky pearls.

Dying
Is an art, like everything else.
I do it exceptionally well.

I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I’ve a call.
–Sylvia Plath, “Lady Lazarus”

I love this poem cos it feels good for someone to finally be on my side.
Little childrenb make me hopeful.
If not for them I would have left long ago.

Romanticism

2005-03-19T19:47:00.001-08:00

Only art can bring us closer to the 'inexpressible'....

What if you slept?
And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed?
And what if, in your dream, you went to heaven
and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower?
And what if, when you awoke, you had the flower in your hand?
Ah, what then?

-Colderidge, an English Romantic poet

"Tired of the eternal efforts to fight our way through raw matter, we chose another way and sought to embrace the infinite. We went inside ourselves and created a new world..." Norwegian-born naturalist Henrik Steffens

Of all the philosophical epochs in europe Romanticism is my favourite. I want to join the cult! It's all about expressing yourself. It's all about individualism. It's all about philosophy, nature and poetry. Romantics are sort of related to hippies except the period of Romanticism came 150 years before hippies. And for your information Beethoven was a Romantic, so there.

... the path of mystery leads inwards...

Diagnose Me

2005-03-19T06:36:00.001-08:00

Something's come over me.

I can't think straight.

I feel faint.

>EAT!

I feel like curling up into a ball.

I constantly feel like crying.

>Chocolate!

Sadly chocolate's not the answer to everything. It's time you knew.

>Are you pmsing?

How should I know?

I feel lonely and apprehensive.

I've got a weird taste in my mouth.

I see a blind spot.

A dull ache.

I am restless

I feel sick but I'm not really

I am sad and I suddenly hate happy things.

Buzz off.

Identity...

2005-03-05T06:32:00.000-08:00

Yesterday upon the stair
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today.
Oh how I wish he'd go away.

-Edgar Allan Poe

Is all that we see or seem But a dream within a dream?

Identity is this super cool movie I just saw. Ten people are trapped in a dingy motel on a stormy night with a killer on the loose. a limo driver escorting a movie star, parents with a young son, a cop transporting a convict, a prostitute, a young couple, and the motel manager are caught up in a rainstorm. The limo driver was a good guy he ran around helping everyone stay calm and helps in indentifying the murderer. In another scene he is charged with the murder. He is puzzled and confused he was the one helping to solve the crime how could he have committed it. Then a phsychiatrist discovers that he has multiple personality disorder and many of the ten people are actually his one personalities. I think one of the women, the limo driver, and the kid. And it turned out to be the kid who was doing all the killing. Damn I make it sound so boring I'm no good at movie reviews. Watch it yerself and enjoy.

Me

2005-02-10T04:25:00.000-08:00

Well I've been posting too many tickle results, it's getting abit boring.

You know what? These holidays, for the first time in my life I don't feel bad about doing nothing.
Usually when I bum I feel really guilty afterwards but this timeI felt pretty good about it.
I guess a little loafing is good for you:P.

Oh darn I've run out of things to say.
I didn't much today so I've got nothing to say. Oh well peace out then.

tickle stuffs

2005-02-09T21:04:00.000-08:00

Vorn, the recurrent theme of your dream life is Empowerment

You're dreaming about antagonistic people and situations that are threatening to diminish your personal power. This means that in some area of your life, you're searching for ways to regain your sense of security and certainty. Dreams are the stories your unconscious narrates each night as you sleep.

Oh well whaddya know.

Vorn, you're inspired by Expressing Yourself

You've got something to say, and nothing feels better than letting the world hear it, whether that means you're into singing, writing, designing — or you're just the kind of woman who's not afraid to share her opinion on the issues that matter most to her. Why should you try to blend?You're a bold individual who definitely gets a kick out of standing out from the crowd. Sure, you might sometimes shock your friends with your loud-n-proud statements, but you know they are often impressed by your courage to show off who you really are. As for you, there's nothing better than the rush you get from being true to yourself and the causes you believe most deeply in.

You know what? I kinda agree with this.

Vorn, when it comes to psychic abilities, you have an unusually strong talent in the area of Precognition

This means you have an uncanny ability to look into the future and know ahead of time what is going to happen. You might, for instance, simply know that you're going to get that job before the interview even happens with a certainty that exceeds what you would expect to have simply knowing the facts of the situation. You might have a sense of dread before going out for the evening only to later have a flat tire on your way home. These little hunches are easy to ignore but for you especially, quite often lead to a true prediction of what is going to happen. These predictions can be used to generate positive outcomes, and the more you know about how to use your talent, the more you will be able to distinguish between fantasy of the future and an actual reality you are seeing happen, before it has actually happened.

HAH! See blawsie I'm phsychic too so there! In conlusion I say these ESP tests are a load of trash.

Vorn, your lucky charm is a Scarab!

Let's hope you're not afraid of bugs, because it turns out that scarabs are your lucky charm. But before you get creeped out, you don't need the living thing for luck to come your way.(No one wants a living dung beetle crawling around in their pocket, after all.) So consider yourself one of the fortunate few. When the likeness of the scarab is stamped, carved or engraved onto stone, glass, wood and metal, it becomes one of the oldest good-luck charms in the world. Keep one next to your heart for long life. Place one next to your head while you sleep for protection. As the sacred symbol of the eternal soul, you might want to carry more than one scarab charm—one for this life and one for the next.

Funkeh!

Vorn, in the last year you've earned 837 karma points

You've earned these points by doing good things, therefore allowing good things to circle back to you. There are 6 different ways people earn karma, and by looking at your responses to this test, we can tell that your compassionate nature is earning you the most karma.In fact, you seem to have a real knack for both understanding what people are going through and finding ways to support them during difficult times. By being a sensitive person with a keen sense of empathy, you can do much to alleviate others' pain. This has been an important way you've earned your karma up to this point. This kindness strengthens your current relationships but suggests it will come back to you positively in the future. Through your concerted efforts to care about and tend to the needs of others, you generate good karma for yourself and the universe.

I love you all!

From tickle

2005-02-09T08:54:00.000-08:00

Discover Your Past Life

Come out and play — in your previous life, you were a hamster named Vladimir. Here's what we know about you: Born on the plains of Siberia, you spent your early years weathering harsh winters, drinking vodka, and attending committee meetings. Determined and headstrong, you always got your way when push came to shove. But it wasn't all darkness — no one knew how to let loose and have a good time better than you. You were the reigning Twister champ, and you always emerged victorious from the Bolshevik's annual Dance-a-Thon (your signature step, the Funky Chicken, was a huge crowd pleaser). As you were also quite the health fanatic, you developed and patented a set of exercise wheel fitness videos that quickly became all the rage in Siberia. Your commercial success led you to denounce Communism and head for the States, where you ultimately provided the inspiration for a wacky Web site and song.

I was a hamster keep that in mind!

Are You Loony?

It only happens once in a blue moon, but when you cut loose, you really cut loose. We wouldn't call you loony, but you might qualify for loon-ish. Because while you've been known to have your moments of insanity, you're usually the model of decorum. That's why people are so tickled when you do occasionally do and say off-the-wall, goofy things. But you usually tend to keep your emotions and behavior strictly in check — making sure the scales are firmly tipped toward "sanity" is something you take pride in. That said, it wouldn't hurt to indulge your loony side a little more often. Being dependable and reliable is one thing; being predictable is something else entirely. So leave work early and go fly a kite. Hire a skywriter to inscribe your squeeze's name in midair. Go skinny dipping in January. Make a point of leaving room for spontaneity and craziness in your life — trust us, it's lots of fun.

I'm a loon and I'm proud to be one!

Vorn, you're As Cool as They Come

Self-confidence always comes in handy for a cool cat like you. You've got a strong sense of self and don't like to do things just because everyone else does. It's your willingness to take risks and experiment that makes you the envy of your friends.

Let others play by the book and follow the path everyone else takes. You know what you want in life, and you aren't afraid to take the steps to get you there — even if others think you're different. You're a true original with a sense of conviction. And it doesn't get much cooler than that.

But if winter colds are keeping you from the cool things you love, get multi-symptom cold and flu relief with an instant cooling sensation you’ll feel right away.

vhy thankew!

What Color Is Your Aura?

We don't need a psychic to tell us that you're giving off a Crimson vibe. Your ruby-red aura reveals your passionate, sensual nature — you're all about earthly pleasure. Whether you're getting a great massage or having a sumptuous dinner, you delight in experiences that fully engage your senses. (Crimson is, after all, the color of roses, wine, and velvet.) That's why it's the material things that really float your boat. If you can taste it, touch it, smell it, or see it right here, right now, you're all over it. After all, you're firmly rooted in reality, preferring to live in the present rather than the future. And you probably have a quick temper, too — most folks with red auras do. But you cool down quickly, turning your outspoken energy and stamina to projects with fast, concrete results. A hot-blooded go-getter like you is always in favor of instant gratification.

Well can't say it's all true it's up to you to decide.

Vorn, you're a Playful Pal

Hey, funny girl. Mischievous and unpredictable, you're always on the lookout for a good time. That's why all kinds of people get such a kick out of spending time with you. They never know what kind of jokes you'll crack, pranks you'll play, or where you'll end up at the end of a night.

But that doesn't mean you don't take things seriously. Staying close with your friends and family is really important to you, and you'll always go the extra mile when someone needs you. All this, plus an ability to see the bright side of anything — now that's a friend indeed.

Hm do you think so?

trala

2005-02-09T07:11:00.000-08:00

Some symptoms of approaching period:

Loss of apetite
Restlessness
Short attention span
Sleeplessness
Pain
Squidginess(?!)

2005-02-09T05:02:00.000-08:00

I just wanted them too see. Tim Cook

CNY

2005-02-08T05:26:00.000-08:00

My first performance, well can hardly be called a performance, played for like a few mins only. But still I was a nervous wreck.

Well the rest of the performance was pretty dull cos I didn't understand most of it. The CO performance was nice tho :D.

Had INO prac later on then met my pri sch friends took neoprints had lunch went home. Sorry not in the mood to blog.

Hey I went to wikipedia aft ck's post and then I was at the RJ article when my bro pointed out that the school song is same as RI's and so....

Auspicium Melioris Aevi

When Stamford Raffles held the torch

That cast Promethean Flame

We faced the challenge of the day

To give our school a name

The eagle eye and gryphon strength

They led us to the fore

To reign supreme in ev'ry sphere

The sons of Singapore

Come heed the call

Rafflesians all

And let our hearts be stirring

We'll do our best whate'er test

And keep our colours flying

Let comradeship and fervent hope

With one voice make us pray

Auspicium Melioris Aevi

With God to guide the way

So... guess what when we go to RJ we'll become SONS

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

2005-02-05T21:37:00.000-08:00

timcook

nuevo principio

2005-02-05T20:47:00.000-08:00

Well new blog new beginning. Unfortunate that I have to start it when I'm depressed.
Anyone here know how it feels to be unloved? When the home you live in is just a house, not a home. When everyone in your family lives their lives independant of each other.
They don't give a damn about what the others think or feel they just do their own thing.
Not even family just a bunch of strangers who happen to live under the same roof.
Where you feel unwelcome. The only interaction is when we're trying to bite each others' necks.
Well if there are any of you peeps out there just want you to know that I feel the same way, unloved.

from tickle:

Vorn, your subconscious mind is driven most by Peace

You have a deeply-rooted desire to make peace in the world. Whether through subtle interactions with loved ones, or through getting involved in social causes, it is important to you to be able to influence the world in a positive way.

You have a deep respect for humankind. You care about the future of the world, even beyond your own involvement in it, and you inspire others to feel the same way. Your innate drive toward peace guides you in daily life towards decisions that are respectful toward yourself and others.

Your psyche is very rich; the more you learn about it, the more you will understand who you really are.